An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her
hat on tight, so that it would not blow off in the wind.

A gentleman approached her and said: “Pardon me, madam. I do not
intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in
this high wind?”

“Yes, I know,” said the lady, “I need both hands to hold
on to this hat!”

“But, madam, you must know that your privates are exposed!”
said the gentleman in earnest.

The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, “Sir,
anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat
yesterday!”