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A forum for issues regarding family life and child rearing.
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raising boys

Mon Jul 31, 2006 6:44 pm +0000

I need some help or advice with my 15 yr. old boy who is doing stupid things. I have caught him searching through my 12 yr. old daughter's drawer and gets her underware and takes it to his room and masterbates with it. I have talk to him about it that it is wrong to do that. he says he will not do it again but he did it again today. I don't know what to do. I have spank him once but I don't think that will help. I don't want to do that again. What can I do make him stop doing that. Please help me. Thank you

Wed Aug 02, 2006 9:42 am +0000

He will grow out of it...... Do not worry about it. Its not a Sin!

His just growing up.

Wed Aug 02, 2006 11:29 am +0000

BassMan, I suspect he is perfectly "normal", if that word can be used with any male entering puberty! I suspect a good dose of openness about all the taboo stuff, including heathy photos of female genitalia will demystify it. The worst thing about sex in our society, is it's apparent "unnatural" and "sinful" labels we attach. Europe handles this much better. Sex is just a very everyday part of being a normal healthy human, and as long as activities do not violate anyone elses privacies or offends them personally. All males I know were to some degree uncomfortable with their raging hormones. Your son needs to know he's okay, and you DO understand, cause you've "been there, done that". Of course you must set proper limits, but avoid leaving any permanent guilt to hound him the rest of his life.
Bro Dave :wink:

Thu Aug 03, 2006 2:46 am +0000

I believe in family counselors. They helped me with my girls. They'd be great support for you and your son. And like Bro Dave said about the value of open communication, that's where the counselor helped us the most.

I missed this post before I'm glad Martin posted a reply to it.
A Child's Respect

Respect of the child for his parents arises, not in knowledge of the obligation implied in parental procreation, but naturally grows as a result of the care, training, and affection which are lovingly displayed in assisting the child to win the battle of life.
The Urantia Book,
Page 941 (84:7.26)

God Bless and be with you Bassman and Son! :smile:

Thu Aug 03, 2006 8:04 pm +0000

THANK YOU. Martin,Bro Dave and Joer for your replies to my post. You guys are the true meaning to brotherhood of men. Praise Almighty God always.

Mon Aug 07, 2006 10:27 am +0000

Bassman, not to make light of your issue but sometimes the adults make it confusing for the kids - see example below.

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, ! ! ! "What's the matter haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

Little boys grow up to be curious bigger boys - it's natural to be curious and we all grow in our depth of understanding. I advise a talk about respect for women and everyone's need for privacy from time to time while acknowledging that his curiousity is normal.

All the best, Ray

Sun Aug 13, 2006 9:29 pm +0000

Thank you Ray, Thank you very much for those words of encouragement and reassurance. Peace be with YOU always.
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