In my view, you may be over-thinking this topic, although it is interesting to try and figure out just what happens to that extinguished personality - where does it go? But it has made me take a bit of a stretch myself...thinking is good.
Personality is the gift of God - the Father of personality. All personality resides in him, except as he bestows it on his children. In my understanding, only those personalities that identify with him and his holy will can attain perfection and return to him in eternity. You wonder:
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Could absorption of personality into the oversoul be likened to fusion of personality and TA?
I don't think so. Personality is personal; the TA is pre-personal, and achieves personality only as it is fused with the personality of the willing possessor of that personality. I don't see how the analogy that you pose can be compared to that. Because...
God the Supreme is a personal deity:
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4. God the Supreme—the actualizing or evolving God of time and space. Personal Deity associatively realizing the time-space experiential achievement of creature-Creator identity. The Supreme Being is personally experiencing the achievement of Deity unity as the evolving and experiential God of the evolutionary creatures of time and space.
As such, he does not absorb that personality of extinction in the same way as the TA and the personality of man achieve fusion.
In my understanding, he absorbs it - perhaps using any goodness in it - for his further evolution. And perhaps the extinguished personality then does have the potential for complete perfection - or at any event unification - in HIS deity nature. As in this quote:
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115:7.6 God the Supreme does not appear to have been inevitable in unqualified infinity, but he seems to be on all relativity levels. He is the indispensable focalizer, summarizer, and encompasser of evolutionary experience, effectively unifying the results of this mode of reality perception in his Deity nature. And all this he appears to do for the purpose of contributing to the appearance of the inevitable eventuation, the superexperience and superfinite manifestation of God the Ultimate
And this one:
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117:4.2 Throughout the grand universe the Supreme struggles for expression. His divine evolution is in measure predicated on the wisdom-action of every personality in existence. When a human being chooses eternal survival, he is cocreating destiny; and in the life of this ascending mortal the finite God finds an increased measure of personality self-realization and an enlargement of experiential sovereignty. But if a creature rejects the eternal career, that part of the Supreme which was dependent on this creature’s choice experiences inescapable delay, a deprivation which must be compensated by substitutional or collateral experience; as for the personality of the nonsurvivor, it is absorbed into the oversoul of creation, becoming a part of the Deity of the Supreme.
Nothing of value is ever lost in God's creation. This explains to me how even an extinguished personality can be used for ultimate good. I think it satisfies your "plate of food" analogy, too, with "personality" representing the food, "you" representing the Supreme:
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To Richard, the food ceases to exist after I consumed it. However, the food continues to exist in me, imparting its health benefits to nourish my body.
Also great reading here: The Oversoul of Creation
https://truthbook.com/urantia-book/paper-117-god-the-supreme#U117_5_0MaryJo