Urantia Book Forum

Urantia Book Discussion Board : Study Group
It is currently Sun Oct 20, 2019 6:16 am +0000

All times are UTC - 7 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 3 posts ] 
Author Message
 Post subject: Abusive Parents
PostPosted:  
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2013 2:09 am +0000
Posts: 9
I have emotional abusive parents. They've been causing me great pain, dissapointment and heartache throughout my life, esspecially as a child and now that I'm married its as if its getting worse. Luckily our Father blessed me with a very loving husband, that protects me against them. But even him they always find fault.

In my life, I have also had heaps of trials and tribulations and sufferings but I always try to stay positive and look on the bright side (What doesn't kill you make you stronger). But even now my career is falling appart after I gave it my all for 7 years; I was betrayed by my employer and my best friend. My heart is in pieces and my parents aren't making it any easier for me.

Please can you tell me if some of us are just meant to suffer more that others? Please can you also tell me what the Urantia book says about abusive parents. I know that I must stand unphased when my life falls appart because I belong to the Kingdom of our Universal Father the Brotherhood, but my heart is broken...

_________________
"Searching for the Truth, should be like a man with his head on fire, looking for water..."


Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Abusive Parents
PostPosted:  
Offline

Joined: Sun Mar 25, 2012 5:29 am +0000
Posts: 3759
Dear Sister - so sorry to hear about your trials and tribulations. Let me begin with the only simple question you asked: no, none is meant to suffer more than others, we all suffer by our own choices and many of us suffer from the choices of others and face the impersonal circumstances life brings to us all.

Now on to some far more difficult issues. The vicissitudes are not accidental in their plan and purpose to be sure. The TA and the angels conspire to create learning by choosing situations. They do not "reward" any with an easy life without conflicts, disappointments, betrayals, and struggle. All so suffer in their way. So there is a pattern at work in this life to transcend the current confusions by finding a better way....a better perspective, a better understanding of reality and relative importance, a better motivation for choosing, and better choices at each intersection of personality and situation. It is a process of learning. So the vicissitudes are a divine tool as hammer and anvil to shape the mind and build the soul by choice units over time.

We are forged in the fire of time and hammered into shape by our choices and their consequences or results. Progress comes in many ways related to many elements of life - it is not uniform. When we appear to face the same challenges endlessly, this is a clear indicator that we are making the same choices of response to the same situational circumstance and getting the same result. Thus, a fundamental change in motive, priority, strategy, or tactic would be strongly indicated.

Look up "vicissitudes" and "forged". We must face all disappointment and disillusionment with faith and accept our responsibility to change ourself and our life within to expect any changes in choices or circumstances. This is not punishment. Some day I believe you will look back and even consider this blessing as such....if it leads you into the Spirit and to a better place to come. I hope others will share their thoughts on this important issue and your questions TruthFinder.


Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Abusive Parents
PostPosted:  
Offline

Joined: Sun Mar 25, 2012 5:29 am +0000
Posts: 3759
None should take anything said here as professional psyche counseling....we just share experience and understanding of the text. But there is much about the mind and the poisons of mind and the fruits of the Spirit for us all to consider here together.

In my own experience, I would suggest that the ego is often able to convince us that others are responsible for our reality and that only others can improve our reality. This is fundamentally false. We create our own reality....especially upon adulthood and emancipation but before that as well in a more limited degree. We create and manage our reality not by being able to manipulate situations, circumstances, and other people. We do so by choosing how we react and then respond to other people, situations, circumstances, etc. And when we find ourselves trapped in an ever recurring cycle of stimuli, response, result....then it should become obvious to us we need to change the response and thereby the result.

I began long ago to monitor all emotional reactions to all stimuli, especially personal interactions. Do I feel mad, sad, offended, insulted, rejected, guilty, afraid, etc.? Why? How's that working? And what then is my response to my reaction? Just by becoming aware of my initial reaction and how I responded to a given situation, I changed everything. I cannot control how others feel or choose or act but I can control my reaction and responses to their expressions of their inner life and I can refuse to let someone else's reality become mine or even affect mine (this takes time and practice by the way, there's no magic switch...takes work and acceptance of the responsibility for SELF). There is no one to blame for our reality except for the one living the reality so chosen.

The more we depend on others to define us, the more disappointment and sorrow will surely follow. Peace.


Top
 Profile Send private message  
Reply with quote  
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 3 posts ] 

All times are UTC - 7 hours


Who is online

Registered users: Google [Bot]


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You can post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group