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An open forum for general discussions of a spiritual nature where guests and readers entertain the teachings of The Urantia Book.
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My Father's Passing, What now

Thu Jan 05, 2006 5:14 am +0000

My father, a long time reader of the Urantia Book, passed on recently. Thanks to him I too was introduced to the Urantia Book, and have had the opportunity to study and grow my understanding with my father for about the last 15 years. He will have a simple memorial service as his ashes are scattered over the ocean. Friends and family will attend this service aboard a boat. My father and I are the only ones in the family who have studied the Urantia Book, and grew in our understanding of God and the Universe. Our beliefs are at a different place than the rest of my family's Christian Faith. The pastor at the church my family has attended has offered to conduct a service, give a eulogy, whatever they do at a memorial service, aboard the boat. In the face of deep frowns, and scoffed eyebrows, I had to decline the pastor’s offer. I feel it would be a complete dishonor to allow a Christian Pastor to speak and impart the standard Christian faith at my fathers funeral, when he has spent years and years building his faith, to what I believe, is well beyond. How can I let this well-intentioned pastor quote passages from the Bible regarding death, heaven, hell, and my dad's sins washed away in the blood of Jesus? He grew from those ideals so long ago. So, it comes to me, since I share what he did believe in, to perform some sort of service. What do I do now? I guess I will write a eulogy. How do I do that? What can I say about the Urantia Book, if anything, that will not offend or create an uncomfortable situation? Has anyone ever delt with issues like these before? Any thoughts or ideas or general words of wisdom would be most appreciated at this moment.

Thu Jan 05, 2006 6:20 am +0000

Hello new friend,

It is nice to have you here among a growing handful of like-minded neighbors! Glad you found this site however you did.

As you know, it is a good thing that your father has graduated from this life cycle upwards toward the next. It is truly a cause to celebrate.

Consider not being offended in any way by a perceived lack of advanced spiritual understanding and insight on the part of any of your fellows or family members at any time. We are all individuals with our seperate lives that we lead. We cannot possibly all be on the same page anytime. Not on this world and not yet. Our Christian fellows believe in the same God and enjoy basically the same ideals as we.....so.....it's all good. Father honors everyone's sincere faith.

Seems you have decided to "conduct" this "service" yourself. Very well....so do it.

How do you write his "eulogy" ? With a pen and piece of paper. :smile:

It will probably be wise to not make any mention of the UB. You can extol the love, goodness, truth and beauty of life, heaven and our Father in heaven all day long without mentioning or divulging and UB-specific names, terms or places.

There is a huge bounty of passages in the UB, especially in Part I that speaks of these things in very general terms and language. A review of this area should be of great assistance to you.

Welcome again to our site and fear not your task of planning or helping to plan this celebration !

Best reguards,

Woody in Georgia

Thu Jan 05, 2006 10:10 pm +0000

Hello My friend what was your fathers name,.. is there any chance any of us would have met him at a conference some time ago.

And with out saying the Urantia book you could say ( And here are some passages that at many time were of great comfort to him as he grew in his love of the Father in haven) our how ever you want to put it.

Re: My Father's Passing, What now

Thu Jan 05, 2006 11:14 pm +0000

May I too add my warm welcome to this site! You wrote:

mktutt11 wrote:My father, a long time reader of the Urantia Book, passed on recently. Thanks to him I too was introduced to the Urantia Book, and have had the opportunity to study and grow my understanding with my father for about the last 15 years.

You and your Dad were indeed blessed to have such an experience. Many of us have had less receptive families...

He will have a simple memorial service as his ashes are scattered over the ocean. Friends and family will attend this service aboard a boat.

That sound really nice!

How can I let this well-intentioned pastor quote passages from the Bible regarding death, heaven, hell, and my dad's sins washed away in the blood of Jesus?

Well, is there any chance you could ask the Pastor to read over the opening of Paper 102:


102:0.1 TO THE unbelieving materialist, man is simply an evolutionary accident. His hopes of survival are strung on a figment of mortal imagination; his fears, loves, longings, and beliefs are but the reaction of the incidental juxtaposition of certain lifeless atoms of matter. No display of energy nor expression of trust can carry him beyond the grave. The devotional labors and inspirational genius of the best of men are doomed to be extinguished by death, the long and lonely night of eternal oblivion and soul extinction. Nameless despair is man's only reward for living and toiling under the temporal sun of mortal existence. Each day of life slowly and surely tightens the grasp of a pitiless doom which a hostile and relentless universe of matter has decreed shall be the crowning insult to everything in human desire which is beautiful, noble, lofty, and good.

102:0.2 But such is not man's end and eternal destiny; such a vision is but the cry of despair uttered by some wandering soul who has become lost in spiritual darkness, and who bravely struggles on in the face of the mechanistic sophistries of a material philosophy, blinded by the confusion and distortion of a complex learning. And all this doom of darkness and all this destiny of despair are forever dispelled by one brave stretch of faith on the part of the most humble and unlearned of God's children on earth.

102:0.3 This saving faith has its birth in the human heart when the moral consciousness of man realizes that human values may be translated in mortal experience from the material to the spiritual, from the human to the divine, from time to eternity.

I selected this for a possible source for my own funeral, and I too am the only UB reader in our family.

I guess I will write a eulogy. How do I do that?

That should be a wonderful opportunity to share how much you loved and respected your Dad, and you very close spiritual relationship. Let those who would be offended find a way to deal with it!

What can I say about the Urantia Book, if anything, that will not offend or create an uncomfortable situation?

Maybe you should take this opportunity to just share contents without revealing the source. It may well cause some to approach you later about the source of your comments.

May the Peace that surpasses understanding carry you through this time. It is,(or should be) as Woody said, a time of great joy! However, the emptyness we feel by losing a loved one cannot be denied. Yet, that in itself is a sort of Eulogy, is it not?

Peace and Love,

Bro Dave


Sat Jan 07, 2006 3:18 pm +0000

I well remember when my brother died. He committed suicide, actually, and my family all gathered together to grieve together. I have never been able to talk to my family about the Urantia Book, which has affected my life for many wonderful hope-filled years, but on that particular occasion I had an opportunity, by girding up the loins of my mind, and screwing up my courage to read three substantial paragraphs from the Urantia Papers where Rodan talks about suicide (Page 1773, Rodan's Greek Philosophy) and you could have heard a pin drop. Every Thought Adjuster in the room was focused on the words I read.

They still don't want to hear about the Urantia Book. They don't want to talk about God or Jesus or prayer or any of the things that makes my life sweet, but I did notice that they were open that day for that message and so I am happy. I think when people listen at such a time of bereavement they hear better than they do on ordinary occasions, even church. I would not run from the use of the phrase "Urantia Book" but I would not make a point of stressing it either. The message is what you want to get across, and, naturally, that is most effectively revealed as you live the supernal truths of the revelation as compared to merely reading them. But I think you will have their attention and you have a great opportunity to say something very hope-filled. Find something inspiring from when the Master was resurrected, for that was certainly his main message ... that we will have life after death. I am also very moved by his words during his Morontia Appearances, for they are so gentle, so confirming, so righteous.

Just tell them, you dad has gone to the Father. And that you'll miss the long talks you used to enjoy as brothers in Christ. But that you know you will see him again, for in the Father's house there are many mansions.

Be of good cheer.

Sun Jan 08, 2006 2:11 pm +0000


I am sorry for your loss here on earth of your father.

I have already began writing my own 'wishes', and verses down to be read at my funeral.

I understand your wanting to speak of your fathers faith and give a service that stands for his belief.
It is his right. You can begin your eulogy by speaking of this.

Each person in this life has their own 'free will'. Even christians cannot despute that. In his free will he chose the UB not as a replacement for the bible, but in addition to it.

I am facing a funeral soon of my husbands grandmother. She is jehovah witness. Unfortunately she is dying sooner because she does not accept blood. That is her faith, and though most of her family wishes her to save herself, they respect her faith.

For people to step in and wish to 'preach' their own beliefs at the memory service of someone is honorable, but to be angry is selfish.
The service is about your father, his life, and his faith.

Do not worry how the others feel in this regaurd. Simply state that you and your father do believe in the UB, and that your father lived his life by it. Because of that you will conduct the service under his beliefs, because it is 'his service'.

As far as what to share, many have already given great verses, and wisdom. I would simply look in the UB where it begins the teachings of 'life after death". Read over, the part of resurrection in the resurrection hall, and the continuing on of a persons spiritual journey to perfection with God.

In the end, do what your father would wish. This is his last moment to speak of how he lived in faith. Worry not over how others take this. If anyone comes to you about it, politely tell them they can choose their own service material for their own memorial time.

If there are others in the family, that would like certain things spoken of, then offer to work with them. Allowing the preacher to conduct the service as long as he keeps it within the guidelines you choose.

In the end, if it is you that conducts the service, simply sit down with pen and paper, think of your father, your faith and teachings in the UB and write of your faith.

Sorry if my thoughts and words are jerky, i'm a little under the weather".....

Point is, you are not alone. And this will not be the only UB faith service -- many more will come, including my own.

May the strength of God be with you.
may his peace guide you



Mon Jan 09, 2006 2:48 am +0000


May God's strenght and Love be with you. TUB lead me to a better understanding of the Bible so I actually coverse better now with Bible goers. Because I knwo the story of jesus. Very much of what's in the Bible and TUB is the same or so simular it's almost interchnageable. And when your telling a story the words don't have to be exact. Tell your father's story as it relates to you and all his peers. Like the personality servival of your Dad drop all the negative and expose the positive. Also look on this site for Parmony and find the bible equivelent for soem of your Dad's favorites parts of TUB. Here's one I read for my Aunt and Cousins a few years ago. They were very unspiritual but found comfort in the Funeral Service, so I thought this would be uplifting to let them know how much GOD loves us.


The Word of the Lord.

A reading from the letter of Paul
to the Romans

If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but handed him over for us all, how will he not also give us everything else along with him? Who will bring a charge against God’s chosen ones? It is God who acquits us. Who will condemn? It was Christ Jesus who died rather was raised who is also at the right hand of God, who indeed intercedes for us.

What will separate us from the Love of Christ? Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or the sword? No, in all these things we conquer overwhelmingly through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor present things, nor future things, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

The Word of the Lord.

This is another note I sent to My Aunt's neighbor, when her husband Mike passed around the same time:

Joanne, I found this interesting, it’s from page 1234 of the Urantia Book, a purported new age revelation. May God be your strength. I truly believe in Jesus’s promise of eternal spiritual life after physical death. This book has some interesting concepts. I do believe we will be with Mike and our loved ones soon to continue our spiritual evolution.
In Christ’s Love! Joe

There is something real, something of human evolution, something additional to the Mystery Monitor, which survives death. This newly appearing entity is the soul, and it survives the death of both your physical body and your material mind. This entity is the conjoint child of the combined life and efforts of the human you in liaison with the divine you, the Adjuster. This child of human and divine parentage constitutes the surviving element of terrestrial origin; it is the morontia self, the immortal soul.

P.1234 - §2 This child of persisting meaning and surviving value is wholly unconscious during the period from death to repersonalization and is in the keeping of the seraphic destiny guardian throughout this season of waiting. You will not function as a conscious being, following death, until you attain the new consciousness of morontia on the mansion worlds…

Be well mktutt11, our love and prayers are with you and your Dad! Amen

Tue Jan 10, 2006 6:38 pm +0000

I kinda think that I would simply state that we shared many beliefs and proceed to talk about them and how the elder governed his life - what he thought was important.

It's not a test, so you don't have to include footnotes. People who have to know about what you say, will ask you about it.

It's about the message of God and it's reflection upon your father's life irregardless of a church or a book.

Unless your father had a actual reversion to "religion", I don't know if he would really object to the standard salvation message from the cleric. Did he want you to make an issue of it? Meaning simply, what is most important at this time.

Of course people want to know about your memories and what you both did together.

In total, you might guess it's about leaving the assembled with a favorable memory of your father.
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